It’s Groundhog Day all over again…

Groundhog Day Cards?!?

I don’t know exactly when Groundhog Day became a Dale fan favorite, but I harbor the nagging suspicion I’ve always loved it. I love the idea of an unassuming varmint who best claim to fame beyond February 2^nd is as a victim of roadkill, having a “day”. I liked that the whole nation comes together for a brief moment in time to watch men in Stovepipe hats, breath steaming in the cold air, hoist a chubby rodent above their heads and read a proclamation as we eagerly lend an ear.

My first official adoption of a Groundhog Day celebration was an accidental incident thirteen years ago. When I’m in a good vibe, I take joy in mailing insignificant things to people I know. Usually, it takes the form of a book I’ve read, but sometimes it’s a moving target. Thirteen years ago, I had a dear friend, living abroad, as an expat in London. For some reason, I got a bee in my bonnet (or maybe it was a burr under my saddle) that I needed to send my now limey friend, a little taste of home in the form as an unsolicited care package from the good ‘ol U.S. of A.

I remember not knowing what to send, so I browsed some “expat bulletin” boards seeking to learn what people living abroad, missed most from home. Whether I got specific ideas or not, I don’t know, but I decided this box would be compilation of the tastes of American consumerism comfort foods. The exact contents are likely lost to the ages, but if memory serves, there were Doritos, Double-stuffed Oreos, Stadium mustard, real Geauga County maple syrup, & maybe a KitKatt bar. I may need some memory confirmation help from Nikki-two-phones on that.

So there I was, boxing up up that shipment of goodness with as much packaging tape as I think an international shipment requires and I look at this plain brown parcel and think “that needs some sizzle”. Since this shipment wasn’t tied to Christmas or anything, I looked at the calendar, which made me realize the box should get to the UK on Groundhog Day +/- a few less important non-rodent named days, but definitely close enough for horseshoes & hand grenades. So I drew a horribly unartistically rendered sketch of a groundhog, wrote “Happy Groundhog Day” on the box and headed to the post office.

After that my Groundhog Day laid dormant like a hibernating rodent for a decade, when one January (1 GH), I decided I wanted to send out Groundhog Day cards to people in my life. Since I’m not the project manager of the Pate household Christmas card department, I decided to enlist the assistance of my lovely bride Vicki for this project. So I told her about the great idea to send out Groundhog Day cards.

The look on Vicki’s face is the exact look one would expect to see when you propose something as visionary as Groundhog Day cards. I don’t know that I can properly describe “the look” with words, but it’s very close to that smirk that gymnast McKayla Maroney is famous for. My wife may or may not have questioned my sanity and asked who I wanted to send them to? The conversation went something like this.

“I’d like to send them to the same people on the Christmas card list.”

“I’m not doing that, they’ll think we’re crazy”

“They likely already know I’m a little off”

“Yes, they likely think YOU are a little off, but they think I’m normal and I don’t want to change that”

Then, I am not making this up, we negotiated for a while and I was ALLOWED to only send something like a dozen Groundhog Day cards that first time. Each recipient was agreed to by Vicki under her view of who was acceptable. I believe those cards (which are now highly sought after collectibles) were send to people who Vicki suspect already knew I was nuts and didn’t risk polite society scandal.

Shortly there after the calls, texts and emails started flowing in. Things like “Hey, thanks for the Groundhog Day card!” or “Only you two would do this”. There was nothing negative at all! People love getting unexpected personal things in the mail. A friend of mine once defined this as “Postal Prozac” and I don’t disagree.

As the second year (2 GH), drew close, the excitement started to build as I had my first convert to Groundhog Day cards by my side. This was awesome, because she brings her crafty artistic competency to the table, along with her organizational wizardry. Printed mailing labels? You ask. Step right up. I don’t know the count for sure, but we probably doubled or tripled our output to 30 or 40 Groundhog Day cards. The crowd went wild.

This year (3 GH), we expanded again. Gone are the days of negotiating who we shouldn’t send a Groundhog Day card to. We’re now in the day of “Do we have an address for this person?” or “Save those Christmas cards for the return address”.

Groundhog Day cards bring some extra challenges, yet creative options and solutions exist. This year I wanted to increase the smile quotient so I searched for ways to up the ante a bit (if such a thing is even possible with Groundhog Day cards). First I hit the post office looking for suitable stamps and at $0.68 each, one doesn’t want to whiff. I arrived at a lovely doily wearing portrait of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, she’s got a special place in the mind of many, and if that now relates to Groundhog Day so be it.

Then I considered the postmark as another opportunity for fun. The obvious choice is Punxsutaweny, Pennsylvania which is the mecca for all things Groundhog. But alas this idea was foiled (this year!) by time and space. Are you ready to go down the metaphorical rabbit hole with the groundhog? The reason I was foiled is because with more pedestrian normal card sending, like Christmas cards, you have a lot more leeway. You can basically send them anytime in December and get a way with it. If it arrives on December 7^th, people will think, “wow, such-and-such is really on their game this year with getting their Christmas cards out.” If the Christmas card arrives on New Years Day, they’ll think, “wow, the post office must have been slammed with packages this year”. You can’t lose at Christmas.

You have no such margin of error for Groundhog Day. You have to try to nail it. So you time it for the cards to arrive no earlier than one day (This is know as Groundhog Eve) or one day late, where we are allowed to blame the postman. This made it impossible (this year) to get my Punxsutaweny postmark, because I didn’t plan for that early enough and had to be in southeast Michigan this week for business.

Looking to make lemonade with post office options, I looked at the map for a Groundhog related postmark name in southeast Michigan. Spoiler alert – there isn’t one, but there is a “Hell” Michigan! I thought to myself “damn, that’s good!” “what could be better for someone than getting a Groundhog Day card” with a Ruth Bader Ginsburg stamp, post marked from Hell?” I know! Right?

But alas, my hat-trick trifecta was thwarted by the fact that while “Hell” does have a postmark, it’s not an actual post office being located, in the back, in a small hell themed general store, which is closed on Tuesdays. Yes, ladies & gentlemen, Hell is closed on Tuesdays. So I had to go to regular old post office and sacrifice creative postmark fun this year.

About 5 o’clock pm on Groundhog Eve the first texts and calls came in, and I’m delighted about it. I also got a call from someone on Groundhog day because they remembered getting a card from me last year. I assured him he was still on the list, and it should arrive soon. I’m hoping this is an actual post office problem and not project pilot error on my part because if anyone deserves a Groundhog day card, it’s the brain who called me because he got one last year.

So, if you’re on the list, I hope you enjoyed the spirit of the card, and it brought a smile your way. If you’re not on the list, I hope you enjoyed the story nevertheless and I encourage you to send us your address, because as every Cleveland Browns fan knows “There’s always next year!”