For some reason I never turn on the bathroom lights in the dead of the night. I must fear the bright watts will wake me more from my sleep than the reason I’m half awake. At home, where I’m aware of the terrain, we have a couple little night lights strategically located. I pay them no mind and go about my business.
While traveling, the stakes get higher, the level of difficulty rises. The room layout often changes from night to night, motel to hotel. Bathroom doors hinge left, doors hinge right, doors slide out of the way, showers have curtains, showers have doors, sink left, sink right, hair dryer on the wall, hair dryer freshly bagged. They all serve the same functions, but the arrangements change. Nevertheless, I fumble through the night, finding my way as needed. Heaven forbid I should flip the switch and make it easy. No, not that, where’s the challenge in that. That would hurt my pride.
You know what hurts more than your pride?
Smashing your face into the corner of one of those all the new rage sliding barn doors at 1am. That’s what.
An instant a bright flash and sense of wonder. Although you would need military grade night vision goggles to see it, stunned, I staggered backwards like Hulk Hogan after the Macho Man whacked him with a folding chair.
I instinctively reached up to my face. My to my surprise the corner of the door split my forehead in coconut fashion. At that moment I reluctantly turned the lights on.